Wall Street PR

Sweatshops for Seniors? Keep Knitting Grandma, I’ll Give You Arthritis (SNPK)

Headline aside, Sunpeaks Ventures (OTC: SNPK) does not crack a whip at your retired grandparents. It does not even make them work for the production cost of Cocoon III. It should. Steve Guttenberg has not worked for a while. Its name, at best, harkens up images of promised daily golfing and assisted living turned kitsch slavery and macrame, serving seniors in any number of locales in both New Mexico and Arizona.

Rather, Sunpeaks is a wholly owned subsidiary of Healthcare Distribution Specialists. Healthcare Distribution Specialists is the lamprey of the pharmaceutical industry. It manufactures over-the-counter “solutions” to the myriad of warnings and side effects that accompany any televised and advertised prescription drug in the “nanny” society in which you live.

You have seen them. Two age and wrinkle-friendly white people running through a public park in a city unlike, but not completely unfamiliar to, your own. Flying a kite while the easily trained border collie’s ears flap in the wind, its love of exercise and its owners on full display.

Then the warnings:

  • Erections that may cause you to be directed to a call center half way around the world.
  • Do not take this drug if currently eating or drinking water.
  • Forty-year-old children of yours may start turning orange.
  • Listening to this warning may cause hypnosis similar to Japanese animation.

In the case of Sunpeaks, it simply manufactures a drug that helps you stop worrying about bleeding out while taking blood thinners. Genius.

It does not play around with drug names either. Your doctor prescribes, say, Warfarin®, a drug that scares most, but equally comforts in its serious-sounding battle against blood clots. Sunpeaks gives you Clotamin®.

Wow that was close. “I want to live forever, but I have had a few friends recovering from strokes. Blood thinners make sense, but I do not want to…wait I will take blood thinners and OTC clotting assistance.”

Sunpeaks closed today at $0.074, up $0.02. This accounted for a gain of over 37%. Trading was heavy with 6.7 million shares changing hands. On any given day over the last 52 weeks, Sunpeaks sees just over a quarter of a million shares traded on average.

Wednesday’s trading was fairly steady following a Tuesday announcement of second quarter 2012 results that included:

  • 1.23 million in sales that represents a 4000% increase in sales from a year ago in the same quarter, and an increase of nearly 30% over quarter one of this year.
  • The company’s reminder that it is now licensed in 30 of 50 states.
  • A bit of vague lip service regarding improvements to IT infrastructure and subsequently streamlined sales.

As long as people continue their desire to live forever, expect to hear more from Sunpeaks. Equally important and similarly relevant is that old folk scare easily.

All that said, your parents are going to spend your inheritance in a Ponce de Leon-like quest to live forever. Make a bit of money off of them while they “steal” yours.

Published by Brendan Byrne

While studying economics, Brendan found himself comfortably falling down the rabbit hole of restaurant work, ultimately opening a consulting business and working as a private wine buyer. On a whim, he moved to China, and in his first week following a triumphant pub quiz victory, he found himself bleeding on the floor based on his arrogance. The same man who put him there offered him a job lecturing for the University of Wales in various sister universities throughout the Middle Kingdom. While primarily lecturing in descriptive and comparative statistics, Brendan simultaneously earned an Msc in Banking and International Finance from the University of Wales-Bangor. He's presently doing something he hates, respecting French people. Well, two, his wife and her mother in the lovely town of Antigua, Guatemala. You may contact Brendan via his email (brendanbyrne@wallstreetpr.com) or his Google+ page (https://plus.google.com/u/0/116608759701551457422).