Nick Carter is mourning the death of his younger brother, Aaron Carter, nearly a year later.
The Backstreet Boy was overcome with emotion as he reflected on his grieving journey after the sudden loss.
“It’s still unbelievable to me,” Nick told E! News. “I’m still processing the whole situation and trying to make sense of it — because it hasn’t.
“It’s just that, no matter what, he’s my brother and I miss him. I love him. I hope one day it’ll all make sense, and I’m working on it,” he added, breaking down in tears.
Nick added his brother’s presence is sorely missed around the holidays, but he’s been coping with Aaron’s death with the help of his family’s support.
“My children are my everything,” he said. “If I lost everything — if I wasn’t a Backstreet Boy anymore, if I didn’t have the opportunity to still perform for people and entertain them — as long as I still had my kids and still had my family, I’d be OK. All this stuff on the outside doesn’t matter to me.”
Nick and Lauren Kitt Carter have three children together — Odin, Saoirse and Pearl.
The father of three said being a parent has helped him grieve over his brother because he focused on his family during his healing journey.
“Being present with my children, listening to them, parent-teacher conferences, driving them to school, taking them to Halloweens and being there when they want to trick-or-treat.”
Aaron was found dead in a bathtub at his Lancaster, California, home Nov. 5, 2022. The musician’s death was caused by drowning with the “effects of difluoroethane and alprazolam” listed as contributing factors, according to the Los Angeles County Department of Medical Examiner-Coroner.
Difluoroethane is an aerosol propellant found in spray cans and alprazolam, more commonly known by the brand name Xanax, a drug used to treat anxiety and panic disorders.
The manner of death was ruled an accident, according to the coroner. Aaron was 34.